Men vs. Women

[GT40FIED]

Alright HST members...let's hear it. You always hear about the vast differences between men and women. Do you buy into them? Personally, I think men and women are more alike than either would care to admit to. People like to generalize and say shit like "all men are dogs" and then guys respond with "all women are whores" and the like...but in the end are any of us really entirely different (other than anatomically of course). I can honestly say I've never cheated on a woman meanwhile I have extremely strong suspicions that my brother's soon-to-be ex wife is cheating on him. But at the same time I know plenty of friends who've cheated on females. So where does all of this devisiveness come from? It can't be as simple as penis vs. vagina. So let's hear it...what makes us so different that assholes like John Gray (of "Men Are From Mars..." fame) write books about it.

Side note: If I can ponder this while I'm drunk, the rest of you should be ashamed of yourselves for not posting here while sober. Keep this forum alive!

I think that men and women are different in certain aspects of life. As far as sexually, men and women can be alike...like being a dog and a whore...
Little boys play with toy trucks...girls play with baby dolls.
Men are less expressive about their feelings...women are more expressive.
Prespectives of men and women are different...like if you saw a picture of a mound of ice cream with a cherry on top...a man could think that that picture could look like the breast of a woman whereas the woman can just see it as a mound of ice cream with a cherry on top...and it has happened before...that's why I shared this reason.
Those are some small things that make me believe that men and women are different

[GT40FIED]

That's a little short sided I think...but then again men and women have different opinions of each other. I for one, being a man, DO notice the little things and do not take everything into a sexual connotation. Sure, I'll make jokes but they're merely that...jokes. Of course children will play with different toys. That's how you're socialized to be. Same with feelings. Men are socialized to display or act out their aggressions and certain emotions while women are taught the exact opposite...nice girls aren't mean or that it's ok to cry around others. This carries over into adult life as well. Men are taught to puff up their chests and attract women while women are taught to be the object of a man's desires. It's all biological...animals do the exact same thing...they just don't pretend it's more than that. Men are biologically programmed to sew as many "seeds" as possible while women are programmed to pick what they believe to be the best mate (these are, of course, generalizations because we've all had that friend or been that friend that went home with some boogawoof whilst on a drunken bender). My point being that perhaps if men and women weren't raised so differently perhaps we wouldn't deny our core instincts like we do. Maybe the true person could emerge and THAT'S what you'd see in Cosmo or Maxim. I don't think we're really all that different.

[Whiteclipse99]

Through out time men and women have been made out to act and think a certain way, different from each other, and I think a lot of people today feel that's the way it should be and maybe act that way because that's what has been drilled into their heads since they can remember. Men have always been stereotyped as being the more dominate, non-sensitive, less expressive species where as females have been stereotyped as being the more romantic, caring, expressive species. Times have changed though and it's become more acceptable to take on traits that were once more primarily that of the opposite sex. So in the end maybe we aren't as different as we think. Does this make any sense? While reading it back to myself I'm not sure if I even can make sense of it.

[ebpda9]

well it's been considered "macho" for men to "nail" as many chicks as they can, but then women get classified as "sluts" if they go out with more men. i dunno, i never pondered on those things. i can say i have "better" things to do than just think about relationships and men vs women.

[Racing Rice]

I personally dont see men and women being that different in relation to relationships, etc. I know many woman that are just as bad if not worse then a lot of men, when it comes to sexuality or relationships. My feelings are, its based on a person by person level. Not a gender by gender level. Everyones equally different perhaps. Sterotypes are just that, sterotypes. Anyone can label someone, but the fact of the matter is we are all humans. We like different things, act differently, walk differently, talk differently.

I guess what Im trying to say is, while no one is equal. No one is really that different when it comes to gender. Thats my rambling for the day.

[DsBlu01CivEX]

I really don't think that men and women are all that different. I really think that a lot of our differences fall back on how we're raised and what we're taught to be acceptable for each gender. Sorta like boys aren't supposed to be sentimental when giving gifts, but girls are...and the guys don't understand why they're getting some random picture of he and his girlfriend. Little does he realize that the picture was the first one taken of the 2 of them. The girl realizes that he's just going to see it as a gift and not the meaning behind it...but it's all good. It's just all in how we're raised and taught to think about things.

I dont think its completelty a enviroment or an issue of your ingrainted values I cant remeber what its called (where's pych 110 when i need it ) but the jist of it is that we as men and women have differnt inhernet goals and needs. Men need to be able to ensure the survival of our jeens so we try to have as many parteners as possible and we want those partners to be faithful to use ( hey i never said we were rational ) women on the other hand want to know that the partner they chose is a sutable amte I.E. he wil be able to provide for the baby and support his family needless to say those are very differnt goals and lead to rather intersting situations but this is the dry clinical explaation if only it were that simple

No one eles is probly going to get this unless they watch the red green show ( thast right I watch PBS tell ya how mch time I got doesnt it) Im man and I can Change....... If i have to ....... I guess

Well...this certainly is an experiment worth initiating. Maybe having two children of yung ages, one boy and one girl, let them live amongst eachother without any envorinmental changes and see how they turn out...what do you guys think would happen? Do you think that the female, as she gets older with developing hormones, will eventually turn into something like "the lady" of today... and will the male eventually divert into "manly ways" of todayor would they both be the same?

[Racing Rice]

Here I thought this would fit the thread nicely.

Dear Diary,

I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do." One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT????!!!" So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear... "You must not be in tune with my emotional needs as a woman." I'm thinking, "what was her first clue?" I eventually realized that nothing was going to happen that night so I went to sleep.

The very next day, we went shopping at a big, unnamed dept. store... I walked around with her while she tried on three different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three. She wanted matching shoes, so I said, "Let's get a pair for each outfit." We went to the jewelry dept. where she gets a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said it was OK. She was almost sexually excited from all of this. You should have seen her face when she said, "I think this is all dear, lets go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out "No honey, I don't feel like buying all of this stuff now."

You should have seen her face... it went completely blank. Then I said, "Really honey! I just wanted you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added, "You must not be in tune with my financial capabilities as a man."

I figure that I won't be having sex again until sometime after the spring of 2008

Oh man, good times

Yea...I got that story on email at work...why is it that men get so upset when girls don't feel like it?

[GT40FIED]

Because we're tired of women having almost entire control of the sex trade in a relationship. I mean, if I'm with a girl I've been seeing for a while I'm up for it pretty much every night. But it's gotten to the point where we almost always have to let you ladies initiate anything because we're not sure when you want sex and we don't want to look like asses for wanting it all the time. Women have almost the same sex drives as men (this is, of course, a person to person thing but just in general they're similar) so how come you're so often "tired" or "have a headache"? We don't get pissed because you don't want sex...we get pissed because you never make any sense when it COMES to sex (no pun intended ).

Well...I don't know about all the other girls, but I would be up for it every night if I could...
I can only think that maybe the girl is on the rag and wants to be discreet about it
Maybe she just has something on her mind and doesn't wanna talk about it
I know that when something bothers me...I just can't stop thinking about it and thinking about that shit while having sex is a major drive shut-off
Maybe she really does have a headache.
I can't imagine not wanting to have sex unless something is really bothering me...there's good reasons for everything...
There might have been something you said or done to piss her off...talk to her...you may be able to know the real reason...
Maybe she does feel like all you want from her is sex...I know I feel like that sometimes...

[GT40FIED]

This is understandable and I've always tried to be the guy that listens and puts up with all of a girl's bullshit (dating or not). There's just one thing you ladies have to remember...unlike many women, most guys need sex to stay leveled. Personally, if I don't have some form of sexual release within about 3 or 4 days I start getting irritable. This is, of course, due to the build up of testosterone. I'm always willing to listen to a woman's problems but sometimes you ladies worry and fret over the shit that is so seemingly (to us men) total bullshit. Like I said...I don't have any problem listening...but don't expect me to be enamored with the fact that I didn't get laid. As for being on the rag...I don't consider that a problem. Me and my ex used to have sex all the time while she was on the rag. So long as you don't go down on her and you wear a condom and be sure to clean up real good afterwords there's no problem. Unless the guy's got severe castration anxiety you should be fine.

Man...I could never do it on the rag...thats gross to me. I totally understand about the sex thing...if Icould have it everyday...I would...unless I am soar from severe gut bustin...

[ShagginJet]

The rag is a tricky 3-5 days. It's best just not to see eachother during these days. The gal is most likely bitchy and anything will set her off, the guy is horny as always and wants it. It's just a bad situation. I've done it on the rag before, not the greatest idea, but f*ck sometimes you want it so much. (that goes for the gal too)

You guys have hit on a variety of topics and honestly the “differences” start with how we as a society deal with kids based on gender. That is where the cycle started and its funny cause we tend to out right treat boys differently than we do girls and that opens a host of issues later on. As a parent, I have a unique view in the sense of having the opportunity to have raised both boys and girls--- For me it’s a simple matter they all do the same things; play with the same types of toys, same sports and heck… I tend to be more strict with the boy because he is the oldest and has to be the example for his younger sisters. But with that being said, my girls are going to get twice as much flack because they are to be expected to be twice as strong and self reliant/ independent. I do not mean to the point where they do not need men in their lives—no. I mean that they will not be dependant or co-dependant on any man. I want them to build their own selves up and have their men compliment them in their lives as pure equals. That is not saying that they don’t expect chivalry to exist (i.e. opening of doors, standing when they enter a room/environment) There are basic courtesies that women deserve and are deserving of. But with that, there must be a manner in which the woman carries herself to show herself worthy and appreciative of said treatment and gestures. Bridging the gaps between the sexes is simple; I think it boils down to chemistry between men and women with some basic respects for both along the way. You would have to start with some basic form of mutual respect to establish some level for your relationship and you build from there. Example, a pure business relationship—you would respect the person (or not) for his/her talents, knowledge and the way they handle themselves. In a personal relationship the same is true but there is chemistry between the parties that is the catalyst for bringing them together and things blossom from there. The basics shift to listening, conversation, feelings, caring and ect,… it boils down to two people – any two people—listening to one another asking questions, exploring the why and what ifs --- defining positions on issues and respecting differences as well as the similarities and being willing to lay it on the line in debate free of ridicule or repercussions.

Well...that says it all...