.:HSTuners::


::Hondas Wanted::
 

Go Back   HSTuners > The Lounge Area > Shifting Gears - Off Topic Discussions
User Name
Password
FAQ Members List Calendar Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-18-2006, 03:45 PM   #1
IALuder
Registered User
 
IALuder's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Des Moines IA
Age: 38
Posts: 7,908
how to shower....

How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband/boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.






How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.


Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.
__________________
93 Si H23vtec......soon to be 12lbs
95 Civic EX....automatic DD

if you cant dazzle them with your brillance, baffle them with your bullshit.
IALuder is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-18-2006, 10:39 PM   #2
VR4_Craver
Banned
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: The stixx
Age: 38
Posts: 1,550
Quote:
Originally Posted by IALuder
How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband/boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.






How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.


Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.



http://www.hstuners.com/forums/showt...ghlight=shower 4th post down

Searching does wonders : )
__________________
me from another forum (im the top geekz0r)
the geekz0r (11:03:46 PM): basicly, look at it this way...the 6speed is the same is the 5speed in 2,3,4,5,and 6...only the speeds are different because of the fd
the geekz0r (11:04:16 PM): so 2nd pulls like 1st in the 5speed, 3rd is like 2nd, etc.
PortugeeTex (11:04:26 PM): so whats 1st like then?
the geekz0r (11:04:49 PM): 1st is like hitting a cheeta in the ass with a tazer
PortugeeTex (11:04:53 PM): lmfao

Last edited by VR4_Craver : 10-18-2006 at 10:44 PM.
VR4_Craver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 12:04 AM   #3
ChrisCantSkate
Thought Police
 
ChrisCantSkate's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: orlando florida
Age: 40
Posts: 9,662
i thought it might be a repost but its still funny
__________________
Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd



Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings.
I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold.
ChrisCantSkate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 04:51 AM   #4
GT40FIED
Best...mod...ever
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: At the end of the longest line
Age: 43
Posts: 7,451
What the hell is a "wiener"? Is that anything like a cock?
__________________
1984 1/2 Mustang GT350 #842, Faster than you...nuff said

Anna Fan Club President/Dictator

Someday, in the event that mankind actually figures out what it is that this world actually revoles around, thousands of people are going to be shocked and perplexed that it was not them. Sometimes this includes me.

"If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever." - George Orwell

Welcome to the new Amerika
GT40FIED is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 09:12 AM   #5
Robert
R-Tard
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 612
Women are different... thankfully!
Robert is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 09:30 AM   #6
Mischief
Registered User
 
Mischief's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Maine
Age: 37
Posts: 2,052
Quote:
Originally Posted by Robert
Women are different... thankfully!
I wish my girlfriend would shake her boobs at me on her way to the shower..
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by GT40FIED
If some girl's going to wrongly accuse me of domestic violence, I'm gonna make it worth the trip to jail and punch her in the fucking throat.


http://mensalmanac.com
Mischief is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 07:40 PM   #7
KwikR6
Mind Blowing
 
KwikR6's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Cloud 69
Age: 44
Posts: 8,871
Quote:
Originally Posted by VR4_Craver




Searching does wonders : )
Are you kidding me. Are you the repost police or something. Wow...take your own advice with the man...seriously.
__________________
I JDM.
I My Honda

The epitome of stupidity is expressed so fluidly with the shity lyric theory you try to spit at me.


I CAN'T WAIT FOR SUMMER!!!
KwikR6 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-19-2006, 10:44 PM   #8
Robert
R-Tard
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 612
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mischief
I wish my girlfriend would shake her boobs at me on her way to the shower..


ask...
Robert is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 07:06 AM.


Powered by vBulletin Version 3.5.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
© 2006 HSTuners.com