.:HSTuners::

ebpda9 · 03-30-2004, 09:04 PM

It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise,
but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research they are proud to present the results.

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent.................................12 Calories
Without her consent............................2187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................8 Calories
With one hand...................................12 Calories
With your teeth.................................485 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection..................................6 Calories
Without an erection............................3315 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary........................................ .12 Calories
69 lying down...................................78 Calories
69 standing up..................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories
Doggy Style......................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier.............................2912 Calories

ORGASMS:
Real........................................112 Calories
Fake............................................13 15 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging...........................18 Calories
Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years....................................36 Calories
30-39 years....................................80 Calories
40-49 years....................................124 Calories
50-59 years....................................1972 Calories
60-69 years....................................7916 Calories
70 and over....................................Results are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly............................................ ........32 Calories
In a hurry............................................. ........98 Calories With her father knocking at the door...........5218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories

Results may vary.

Cathy

IALuder · 03-30-2004, 09:09 PM

god damn. no wonder im so skinny and under weight. 142LBs.
i never knew it was actually GOOD for you.
fat people need not a diet but a lot more sex. which this also might mean obeastity is from people not getting enough.

Fatal070 · 03-30-2004, 09:27 PM

LMAO, thanks for my laugh tonight hahah

03-30-2004, 11:09 PM

I dont think so i anit gettin any and i way 135 arg o well ( dang religios girlfirend

)

mylittlecivic · 03-31-2004, 12:56 AM

haha thats great!

ShagginJet · 03-31-2004, 10:54 AM

Looks like my sexual calorie burn is 0 then.

*KwikR6* · 03-31-2004, 11:48 AM

Right now same with me

hahaha

DsBlu01CivEX · 03-31-2004, 09:32 PM

Glad I'm able to burn calories other ways.

Rob · 04-01-2004, 01:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by DsBlu01CivEX
Glad I'm able to burn calories other ways.

D'oh!

03-30-2004, 09:04 PM	#1
ebpda9 Repost Wagon Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: over here Age: 44 Posts: 17,266	Exercise It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research they are proud to present the results. REMOVING HER CLOTHES: With her consent.................................12 Calories Without her consent............................2187 Calories OPENING HER BRA: With both hands.................................8 Calories With one hand...................................12 Calories With your teeth.................................485 Calories PUTTING ON A CONDOM: With an erection..................................6 Calories Without an erection............................3315 Calories POSITIONS: Missionary........................................ .12 Calories 69 lying down...................................78 Calories 69 standing up..................................812 Calories Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories Doggy Style......................................326 Calories Italian chandelier.............................2912 Calories ORGASMS: Real........................................112 Calories Fake............................................13 15 Calories POST ORGASM: Lying in bed hugging...........................18 Calories Getting up immediately.........................36 Calories Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are: 20-29 years....................................36 Calories 30-39 years....................................80 Calories 40-49 years....................................124 Calories 50-59 years....................................1972 Calories 60-69 years....................................7916 Calories 70 and over....................................Results are still pending DRESSING AFTERWARDS: Calmly............................................ ........32 Calories In a hurry............................................. ........98 Calories With her father knocking at the door...........5218 Calories With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories Results may vary. Cathy __________________

03-30-2004, 09:09 PM	#2
IALuder Registered User Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Des Moines IA Age: 38 Posts: 7,908	god damn. no wonder im so skinny and under weight. 142LBs. i never knew it was actually GOOD for you. fat people need not a diet but a lot more sex. which this also might mean obeastity is from people not getting enough. __________________ 93 Si H23vtec......soon to be 12lbs 95 Civic EX....automatic DD if you cant dazzle them with your brillance, baffle them with your bullshit.

03-30-2004, 09:27 PM	#3
Fatal070 Registered User Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: New Castle , Pa Age: 40 Posts: 1,299	LMAO, thanks for my laugh tonight hahah __________________

03-31-2004, 10:54 AM	#6
ShagginJet Registered User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 1,584	Looks like my sexual calorie burn is 0 then. __________________ RECENTLY UPDATED!!! 5-20-04 http://63.249.135.19/hdrive/car/index.htm

03-31-2004, 11:48 AM	#7
KwikR6 Mind Blowing Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Cloud 69 Age: 44 Posts: 8,871	Right now same with me hahaha __________________ I JDM. I My Honda The epitome of stupidity is expressed so fluidly with the shity lyric theory you try to spit at me. I CAN'T WAIT FOR SUMMER!!!

03-30-2004, 11:09 PM	#4
4doorspeedman Posts: n/a	I dont think so i anit gettin any and i way 135 arg o well ( dang religios girlfirend )

03-31-2004, 09:32 PM	#8
DsBlu01CivEX Registered User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: York Age: 44 Posts: 2,542	Glad I'm able to burn calories other ways. __________________ "Oh, I have a goal. And it's to have no goals at all." http://www.myspace.com/kenike

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Switch to Linear Mode Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode