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Old 12-09-2002, 02:16 PM   #1
msvtec14
 
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Why?

Why will a guy say that he cares about a girl and that he likes her so much and blah, blah, blah and then he will treat her like crap? Can someone explain that? Why do guys seem so nice and sweet at first and then turn out to be someone else?
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Old 12-09-2002, 02:33 PM   #2
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Maybe for the same reason girls say they want Prince Charming and then the crap on him and toss him to the curb and go off with the asshole?

Probably not the same reason, I think your question applies to more than just guys. People often put on a front in the beginning, they either try to be who they want to be or who they think you want them to be. Guys and girls fall victim to this. The only explanation I can offer is quite simple yet very complex: deep issues.

b
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Old 12-09-2002, 02:42 PM   #3
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My guess would be that he was nice Before you gave him access to your vagina...

My second guess is that he was not so nice After you gave him access to your vagina...

You see many guys out there are looking to get access to as much vagina as possible. Seeing as girls do not respond well to:
"I'm interested in accessing your vagina so I can add your fine ass to my "have done" list. At which point I will try to access the vagina's of all of you fine ass friends."

Sure you get some takers but they're usually the ones who don't mind cuz if you try to remove them from your life they'll stock you.

while nice girls who they can dupe just stay at home and cry about how they're not nice anymore.

So I think that's probobly his motivation....

My advice to you is... Watch people closely ( ya that's it pay attention) most of the time you can tell when someone is B.S.ing you.

Just don't go blindly into these things expecting that every hope and fantasy you have is true. most of the time people aren't as nice as they seem to be. The longer you make a guy wait also the less likely he is to bolt afterwords... not like that's the best tactic (holding out the booty till your sure) but realize befor you have sex with anyone that sex could very well be ALL that they were interested in.

good luck
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Old 12-09-2002, 02:49 PM   #4
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"My guess would be that he was nice Before you gave him access to your vagina...

My second guess is that he was not so nice After you gave him access to your vagina..."


LOL, that was funny. Uh, I'm trying to think. I waited several weeks before "giving access". I just waited until I felt that I was ready and that it felt right. And he didn't change after that at all. We just became closer. He has some stuff going on in his own life right now and he says that's what's been bothering him but he has just been acting so distant lately.
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Old 12-09-2002, 02:58 PM   #5
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Well in that case it might just be normal growing apart or it could be that he's confident enough in your feelings for him that he doesn't want to worry about treating you the way you want RIGHT NOW. He may resolve the problems and be just fine in a little bit.

My best piece of advice is "don't sweat it" if he's right it'll just happen if not then well... it'll just happen
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Old 12-09-2002, 03:11 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by nonovurbizniz
Well in that case it might just be normal growing apart or it could be that he's confident enough in your feelings for him that he doesn't want to worry about treating you the way you want RIGHT NOW. He may resolve the problems and be just fine in a little bit.

My best piece of advice is "don't sweat it" if he's right it'll just happen if not then well... it'll just happen


Wow, that is a good way to think of it. One of my friends said something to that extent but it was not as good.
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Old 12-09-2002, 03:54 PM   #7
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People change also because of others.
The guy/girl might be acting nice around you, but once you are not up to their standards (looks, personailty, morals etc), they act differently with you. Try to avoid you...etc.
People also change because in the beginning of the relationship, they try to put up a front like spoogenet said, and that is because int he beginnign is when the person tries to impress you. The longer you go on with the relationship, that person thinks that they can be their real self now, and that you'll forgive them no matter what since both of you are in "love" (which is a whole other story)
well you get what I mean (I hope)
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Old 12-09-2002, 03:57 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by nonovurbizniz
Well in that case it might just be normal growing apart or it could be that he's confident enough in your feelings for him that he doesn't want to worry about treating you the way you want RIGHT NOW. He may resolve the problems and be just fine in a little bit.

My best piece of advice is "don't sweat it" if he's right it'll just happen if not then well... it'll just happen


took the words right out of my mouth.. cheers and ditto to that think that about sums it up
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Old 12-10-2002, 12:42 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by mt.biker
took the words right out of my mouth..




It must have been while I was kissin you....

sorry couldn't resist. (meatloaf song for those who now think mt.biker and I are gay lovers (it would never work I'm too old for him J/K)
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Old 12-10-2002, 02:22 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by juvenile
People change also because of others.
The guy/girl might be acting nice around you, but once you are not up to their standards (looks, personailty, morals etc), they act differently with you. Try to avoid you...etc.
People also change because in the beginning of the relationship, they try to put up a front like spoogenet said, and that is because int he beginnign is when the person tries to impress you. The longer you go on with the relationship, that person thinks that they can be their real self now, and that you'll forgive them no matter what since both of you are in "love" (which is a whole other story)
well you get what I mean (I hope)


Yeah, I pretty much get what everyone is saying but in terms of the whole standard thing. Our standards are something that we
pretty much refer to upon first meeting that person so how all of a sudden could I not be meeting his? Nothing has changed in terms of my looks, personality or etc. I didn't just turn into a ***** overnight or anything.
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Old 12-10-2002, 02:58 PM   #11
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sometimes you like aspects of a person... upon getting to know them you don't like things about them... if the bad out weighs the good then some people decide to move on.

this is not to say anything about you. The chances that this guy is the one for you are pretty low... somewhere in the neighborhood of 1 to 6,259,378,087 (the current world population).

I say **** it move on if he changes his ways then maybe you take him back... if not then who cares you'll meet someone new.

I'm not picking on you but... why is it that girls get sooo attached when there really isn't that much holding you there to begin with (the answer is their own self-confidence issues... they're more concerned with WHY the guy wants to leave instead of why it's a GOOD thing that the guy wants to leave.)

My point is that if he was being nice and you took the time to think about why you like him chances are you'll realize there aren't that many good reasons.

It's like the seinfield episode where george is joking and says "what are you doin with this guy" and the girl thinks about it and leaves him. (this happened to a friend of mine. it was really funny. One of our friends asked her joking around "how in gods name did he end up with you" and she realized how much better she could do.... she left him.

Chances are your not loosing out especially since the guy is being enough of a dick to make you post this thread.

BUCK UP LITTLE CAMPER
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Old 12-10-2002, 03:18 PM   #12
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Oh, I totally hear whay you're saying. And I haven't grown all attached and whatnot. Well, I guess I am in the sense that I really do care about him and I do have feelings for him. But I'm not all obsessed with him and always wearing his clothes 24/7. I dunno, I've seen girls do that... And the good definitely outweighs the bad. And if it didn't, I'd be out. And done. I'm just going to take the advice of just standing back and going with the flow and seeing what happens.
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Old 12-10-2002, 03:24 PM   #13
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that's the best thing to do in ALL cases.

time don't stop for noone. So enjoy the ride.
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Old 12-10-2002, 03:34 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by nonovurbizniz
that's the best thing to do in ALL cases.

time don't stop for noone. So enjoy the ride.


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Old 12-10-2002, 03:37 PM   #15
msvtec14
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by nonovurbizniz
that's the best thing to do in ALL cases.

time don't stop for noone. So enjoy the ride.



Oh, yes. Always.
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Old 12-11-2002, 01:38 AM   #16
ShEaNy
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he just wants sex ....thats my 2 bucks worth...lol
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Old 12-11-2002, 08:50 AM   #17
msvtec14
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by sheany_91accord
he just wants sex ....thats my 2 bucks worth...lol


Yeah, that was probably it because now we're not together anymore. Oh well. What's done is done.
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Old 12-11-2002, 11:46 AM   #18
msvtec14
 
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IT IS ALL A CROCK OF SHIT.
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Old 12-11-2002, 04:20 PM   #19
FletchQ
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by sheany_91accord
he just wants sex ....thats my 2 bucks worth...lol

I think I would have to agree with that assesment
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Old 12-11-2002, 04:29 PM   #20
msvtec14
 
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Well, for whatever reason that ended. I'm just happy that it did sonner than later.
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