I dunno about Michigan, but around here we have these things called cave crickets. They look like a cross between a spider and a cricket (like something out of the middle ages) and don't have any wings so they can't fly or make noise. Those little f@ckers will bite you and it looks like a spider bite. Plus spider bites usually look like you got bit twice...two sets of puncture marks.
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Someday, in the event that mankind actually figures out what it is that this world actually revoles around, thousands of people are going to be shocked and perplexed that it was not them. Sometimes this includes me.
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