HSTuners - the penis talks

The Penis Talks
>
> I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for
> the following reasons:
> -I do physical labor.
> -I work at great depths.
> -I plunge head first into everything I do.
> -I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
> -I work in a damp environment. I don't get paid
> overtime.
> -I work in a dark workplace that has poor
> ventilation.
> -I work in high temperatures.
> -My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
>
> Dear Penis,
>
> After assessing your request, and considering the
> arguments you have raised, the administration
> rejects your request for the following reasons:
>
> -You do not work 8 hours straight.
> -You fall asleep on the job after brief work
> periods.
> -You do not always follow the orders of the
> management team.
> -You do not stay in your designated area and are> often seen visiting other locations.
> -You do not take initiative; you need to be
> pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
> -You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of
> your shift.
> -You don't always observe necessary safety
> regulations, such as wearing the correct protective
> clothing.
> -You will retire well before you are 65.
> -You are unable to work double shifts.
> -You sometimes leave your designated work before you
> have completed the assigned task.
> -And if that were not all, you have been seen
> constantly entering and exiting the workplace
> carrying two suspicious looking bags.