Funniest thing you’ve heard/said while being intimate

[IALuder]

"people say some crazy things while having sex... one time I called this girl Mom!"
Randal, Clerks

me and my girl at the time were going at it for a while. after I finished I went out of my room to get a drink, it was late at night by that time.

on my way back to my room my step dad was standing outside the hall way half asleep... and said "this weekend we are geting you a new box spring.. the squeeking is keeping your mother and I up"

at that point, I couldn't stop laughing...


so what's the funniest things you have heard or said?

[MissJDM]

Ben + Girl - Sock = say whaaaaaaaaaat!?

[JDMFantasy2k]

part of my christmas present was that my girlfriend dressed up in the victoria secret christmas outfit ( the pink santa hat, with the pink mini skirt, and pink bra), and proceeded to sex me up big time.

So right as she's on top and we start going i say " so i've been a good boy this year?" and we both started laughing hysterically. Probably had to be there but it was funny.

[Grip72]

Originally posted by JDMFantasy2k
part of my christmas present was that my girlfriend dressed up in the victoria secret christmas outfit ( the pink santa hat, with the pink mini skirt, and pink bra), and proceeded to sex me up big time.

So right as she's on top and we start going i say " so i've been a good boy this year?" and we both started laughing hysterically. Probably had to be there but it was funny.

hahahaha that's pretty good
that victoria secret getup must've been pretty sexy haha

i KNOW i've said some funny shit but it's not coming to my head right now

[Wren57]

only thing I've said that comes to mind is I once said "we should probably do this sometimes when we're sober"

[Mischief]

haha oh jesus.. I've had a girl say after seeing my shit "oh my I can't take all that action" made me laugh.. I've also been asked if I read a manual on how to have sex hahah

[Wren57]

nice... if we are also posting what girls have said, one once said "Hold on, can we take a three minute break?"

[Grip72]

hahaha i love it when girls say something funny during sex or afterwards lol..takes the edge off hahaha. my "gf", how lives 3 hours away just told me this weekend "i'm giong to have to get a dildo made the same as ur penis because DAMN i'm going to miss it" hahahahha


....awkward?

[Wren57]

not awkward... everyone has a big penis on the internet ;)

[Mischief]

i don't.. on the internet I'm 3 inches hard

[Grip72]

not awkward... everyone has a big penis on the internet ;)


you're so right hahaha..

[GT40FIED]

I'm only sporting 4 inches...FROM THE FLOOR!!!:D

Bwahahaha. Sorry...I had to.

[Grip72]

I'm only sporting 4 inches...FROM THE FLOOR!!!:D

Bwahahaha. Sorry...I had to.

when you're lying flat on ur stomach....

[KwikR6]

Funniest thing my gf ever said to me when she was down on me. She grabbed it and proceeded to say in to the tip of my cock "Speak into the mic"

We laughed for like 20 min....then fucked.

[Grip72]

bahahahahaa that is classic

[GT40FIED]

Funniest thing my gf ever said to me when she was down on me. She grabbed it and proceeded to say in to the tip of my cock "Speak into the mic"

We laughed for like 20 min....then fucked.

If I had a nickel for every time I saw a chick in a porn say that...

[Grip72]

you fuckin pervert..watching porn..haha jk

[GT40FIED]

Mwahaha. Gotta clean the pipes somehow man. So long as no ladies are volunteering for the job, porn it is!

[CD5Passion]

after we were done having sex the first time (when I lost my virginity) with my (no ex)girlfriend. We decided to go out for some dinner and on the car ride there she called her girlfriend and immediatly told her "yeah we had sex, and he was a god damned good at it" apparently a lot of her lady friends wanted to know and had been naggin her for a month or two about it ahah. that shit had me laughing the rest of the car ride

[mcwheels]

I got a phone call for a job interview while I was having sex once. I would have let it go to voicemail if it werent for the fact that I Really wanted this job. I stayed in her as long as I could and maintain concentration, but eventually I had to roll off her to finish the call.